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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Own Your Own Country for as Little as $14 Trillion

Own your own country for as little as $14 Trillion

Obama places country up for bid on eBay, citing government’s inability to manage money or to compromise on massive debt restructuring…easy credit terms arranged.  Must be approved by Federal Reserve and other current debt holders.

If a suitable buyer isn’t found by August 8th, the USA will go into bankruptcy receivership and its assets will be sold at auction by the US Marshals Service.

Leaders from both parties say they’re stumped, admitting for the first time they’ve been on a blinding spending binge for more than 35 years…

Meanwhile, special interest groups and corporate leaders, who’ve been suckling at the public teat for decades, have been rapidly moving their assets to offshore banks and converting their dollars to Swiss Franks.  Swiss officials admit they’re having a tough time keeping up with demand.

The Internal Revenue Service, collection agent for the Federal Reserve, announced they’ve already milked dry the middle class and have no backup plan in place for securing more money from an already overstretched taxpaying public.

Recipients of Social Security and other government handouts are worried as funding of their inflation laden checks will be cut off soon, reports the Treasury Department.

It’s rumored that public sector workers and other government employees are resigning en masse as paychecks are scheduled to be halted by the middle of August.  Vice President Joe Biden warned employees and law enforcement officials, “Stay the course, do not abandon ship, we’ll take care of you.”

Leaders from China are already lining up to see what government assets they might grab in order to satisfy the outstanding debt owed to their country.  They’ve promised the American people they will issue Chinese currency to Americans in need as a stop gap measure.  “Our stockholders at Wal Mart are very concerned but we’ll cover the losses,” promises the Chinese premier.
Source:  The Bitter End Syndicate

1 comment:

MinimalistGroup said...

Outstanding, funny but scary as it is so close to the truth.